Saturday, December 16, 2017

What I Wonder About Aging

I recently read actor Bill Pullman’s comment about his new movie, “The Ballad of Lefty Brown”: that it was his “coming-of-age-at-63” role. Meaning, I think, that not only does he play an older character, but that he is doing so at age 63.

Kind of fun, that phrase, and it put me in mind of what’s been written lately about the current (vs. traditional) aging process: that there are different stages, tasks, and opportunities within it.

One of the authors who considers this is Michael Gurian. In his book, “The Wonder of Aging,” he suggest three developmental aging stages:

--the Age of Transformation: approximately 50 to approximately 65;
--the Age of Distinction: approximately 65 to the late 70’s;
--the Age of Completion, approximately 80 – 100 and beyond.

I quite like Gurian’s use of the word “approximately,” as we know that no one person ages the same as another. In fact, though age-wise I’m tucked comfortably in the Age of Distinction, I may not quite reach it by my late 70’s. Some of us—as my father remarked when I completed my master’s degree at 45—are clearly late bloomers.

Which means I could be transforming, distincting, and completing all at the same time, assuming I live as long as my father did, until age 95.

What I mostly wonder about the wonders of aging is whether we should use “coming of age” to describe it. After all, that term typically refers to our moving from our teen-age years into adulthood, when, as the Merriam-Webster online dictionary defines it, we attain “prominence, respectability, recognition, or maturity.”

But then isn’t it true that each developmental stage in our too brief lives has its own “coming of age” markers? Childhood, adolescence, adulthood? And so why not old age? Or what psychologist Erik Erickson called Late Adulthood, his 8th stage of development?
  
So it would seem that we agers need to figure out how to move into and through our Late Adulthood. And decide what we want to attain while there. Each of Gurian's three-part aging process offers its own distinct tasks and opportunities, which might give us some useful ideas.

To learn what those elements are, you can read Gurian’s book, "The Wonder of Aging." Click here to see more info about it:




Thursday, December 7, 2017

Aging With Purpose

When I was growing up in the ‘50s, the idea of there being a purpose to aging would have seemed ludicrous. Purpose to getting old? Aside from hoping to retire before you died—so you might squeeze in a little traveling, more golf, and special time with the grandkids—what other purpose was there?

But then the Boomers came along, some 77 million of them starting in 1946, and changed the whole experience of aging, in part because those that turned 65 in 2011, a mere six years ago, can expect to live, on average, to 83. Some even longer.

But beyond the sheer length of their lives, Boomers by some accounts will age in better health. And not only because of the wonders of modern medicine. Many took up healthier lifestyles as adults, including quitting smoking and regularly exercising.

And even though I’m not a Boomer, having been born a little over two years before they arrived on the scene, I find that living both longer and healthier has trickled down to some members of my own "war babies" generation. (For instance, in my late 30's, I finally quit smoking, and also took up serious walking, a habit my rescue dog helped me develop.)

And so, in some weird way, for many of us getting old has become a bit of an adventure, urging us to think about what we want to do with those extra, unanticipated years. As a writer and teacher, I’m keen not only to explore my own options, but also help others consider theirs.

Hence my newest journal writing workshop: The Purpose of Aging, Aging with Purpose. It’s inspired by much of what I’ve been reading about aging for the past several years, including Reinventing Aging: Harvard School of Public Health—MetLife Foundation Initiative on Retirement & Civic Engagement (2006). 

Here's an excerpt from the Initiative, one that I'm interested in because of its focus on civic engagement. After all, might not our collective life experiences benefit those communities we choose to engage with? And, in the end, isn't that a win-win for all involved?

“When psychologist Erik Erikson delineated his concept of the life cycle, he saw the final stage, commencing in one’s 60s, as a retrospective undertaking toward the end of life. Erikson later revisited his earlier work to take into account the new demographics, and warned against “an initial retirement holiday followed by a dangling and unproductive aging of many years’ duration.” Erikson and colleagues urged those in their 50s to develop plans to meet the challenge “squarely,” advocating “‘clear insight’ into how the elders in our present society can become more integral coworkers in community life.” An organized effort could help boomers envision, and plan for, a life that achieves meaning in their later years by connecting in new ways to the larger community around them.”


 For more information about my workshop, scheduled in Rogers Park on Thursday, February 15, 2018, from 6-8 pm, please email me at madmoon55@hotmail.com.